aliafshar - Network

"The Verge reached out to Musk for comment. Twitter no longer has a communications department."Thank you, The Verge. My deepest,...

"The Verge reached out to Musk for comment. Twitter no longer has a communications department."

Thank you, The Verge. My deepest, heart-felt gratitude.

Because remember peeps, and especially tweeps - whatever happens, we still have (legal) comedy...

<end>

And to round it off, our new favourite lawyer indicates that 1. Twitter is dead - yeap, sadly, probably, maybe, but I think it's dead....

And to round it off, our new favourite lawyer indicates that

1. Twitter is dead - yeap, sadly, probably, maybe, but I think it's dead. <sad face>

2. Here's how to be a whistleblower.

Wait what?!

I'm clutching my aching head asking myself did a company lawyer just tell the whole company about the SECRET WHISTLEBLOWER HOTLINE?!

3. I'm out for a day

YOU CAN FIRE ME ROCKET BOY BUT ALL YOU ARE GETTING TODAY IS MY OUT OF OFFICE EMAIL AUTO-RESPONDER, SEE YOU NEXT TUESDAY

Telling an engineer they have to be personally responsible, -PERSONALLY LIABLE - actually made me tremble.I've done a bunch of...

Telling an engineer they have to be personally responsible, -PERSONALLY LIABLE - actually made me tremble.

I've done a bunch of terrifying jobs, seriously terrifying-kids-lives-in-your-hands and this is equivalent to saying:

Yo, Mr Cardiac Surgeon - today, and forever, you are also the anesthesiologist, oh and the chief of anesthesiology, pharmacology, and medical equipment all quit.

Good luck motherfucker.

"I have heard ... that Elon is willing to take on a huge amount of risk in relation to this company and its users, because 'Elon...

"I have heard ... that Elon is willing to take on a huge amount of risk in relation to this company and its users, because 'Elon puts rockets into space, he’s not afraid of the FTC.'"

<BLINK BLINK RE-READ SWEAT>

wuuuuddzeeefaaaark!?

THERE'S MORE

"because of the tight SLA’s (of two weeks?!) between product inception > launch, Legal will “have to shift the burden to engineers” to self-certify compliance with FTC requirements and other laws."

Engineers?? That's me! No wait omg that's me...

And continues with a takedown of the new boss' motives and personal priorities, which didn't disturb me but yeah, you are either in...

And continues with a takedown of the new boss' motives and personal priorities, which didn't disturb me but yeah, you are either in the ZOMG-TESLA-UBER-GENIUS-ROCKETS camp or you aren't, and frankly I was never close.

Real genius is a rare breed and I've met few. Perhaps a recurring theme of my personal brand of what it takes to be a genius is humility and humility this ain't.

So I'm kinda amused that the boss is getting taken down on company slack and then shit gets dark...

"I also remind all Tweeps (at least in the US) that we have an unlimited PTO policy. All Tweeps are able to take PTO. Perhaps today is...

"I also remind all Tweeps (at least in the US) that we have an unlimited PTO policy. All Tweeps are able to take PTO. Perhaps today is a good day to take some rest and recharge."

THAT'S GONNA MAKE THE NEW BOSS HAPPY HE REALLY SEEMS LIKE AN UNLIMITED TIME OFF KINDA GUY SURE THING TAKE A MONTH WHY NOT

Now imagine, half the company got fired.Then almost immediately the bossy top boss-people responsible for:1. Information security2....

Now imagine, half the company got fired.

Then almost immediately the bossy top boss-people responsible for:

1. Information security
2. Privacy
3. Compliance

just walked out of the company.

Aside: I had to read this like 4 times in the article because there are no amount of what-the-actual-fuck GIFs able to describe this.

Now this lion-hearted lawyer begins by saying: You probably don't have to go back to the office, oh and I AM a lawyer

and continues...

Maybe it is finally hitting home (my brain absorbs slowly). The honeymoon is over - batten down the hatches - fight them on the beaches...

Maybe it is finally hitting home (my brain absorbs slowly). The honeymoon is over - batten down the hatches - fight them on the beaches 'n all that.

But I don't think that's just it. I like hard work. I enjoy running engineering teams and software products as lean as possible. We benefit greatly from generating shared stakeholder accountability with the hugely talented cross-functional teams we have at Google.

Yeah. It's not just that. Read what the bravest lawyer I ever saw wrote...

I can't quite pinpoint why I am so unsettled by this article."thank fuck we have good counsel and thank fuck for the privacy...

I can't quite pinpoint why I am so unsettled by this article.

"thank fuck we have good counsel and thank fuck for the privacy team"

are two recurring thoughts I have while doing the business of leading something in big #tech. And I see that it is a thin, thin, line between where I am, and this happening...

https://www.theverge.com/2022/11/10/23451198/twitter-ftc-elon-musk-lawyer-changes-fine-warning

a thread

https://about.fb.com/news/2022/11/mark-zuckerberg-layoff-message-to-employees/ a quite terrifying time for big #tech thinking of you, Meta...

https://about.fb.com/news/2022/11/mark-zuckerberg-layoff-message-to-employees/ a quite terrifying time for big #tech

thinking of you, Meta employees

Without cheating, who knows which city Streeling University is in?

Without cheating, who knows which city Streeling University is in?

2022 is the year of a sensible news stories abruptly ending with "and then proceeded to glue themselves to the floor."

2022 is the year of a sensible news stories abruptly ending with "and then proceeded to glue themselves to the floor."

#tech mastodon, where are you?

#tech mastodon, where are you?