ariagrace - Network

"I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them."#Endwalker early access...

"I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them."

#Endwalker early access started 3 years ago today. I took a week off work and went all-in, logging in at 6am to avoid the queues and not logging out until ~midnight. It was a crazy wild time, a frenetic almost festival atmosphere, as people finished up the MSQ, looked around at each other through the tears and realized that (minor quibbles aside) SE actually stuck the fucking landing and avoided shitting the bed like so many other big media properties had done over the last few years.

Outside of that, I was finally getting used to the idea of who I was. Things at work were "good" in that while I was tired of my job I didn't actively hate it or my boss, and I had hopes for a shift to a role less focused on IT support.

I'm pretty sure I knew how good things were in that brief stretch of time. It's definitely clear how good things were, considering the shitshows looming on the horizon (IRL and in game).

Further enhanced by having "I Really Want to Stay At Your House" on loop / repeat.

Further enhanced by having "I Really Want to Stay At Your House" on loop / repeat.

Writing a blatantly autobiographical (to me, anyway) fantasy story about a woman who doesn't know that she is not, in fact, a human is...

Writing a blatantly autobiographical (to me, anyway) fantasy story about a woman who doesn't know that she is not, in fact, a human is proving to be a little more cathartic and raw than I was anticipating. But in a good way.

It's one thing to take inspiration from Thing when writing a book... But when you specifically cite it in the beginning foreword /...

It's one thing to take inspiration from Thing when writing a book... But when you specifically cite it in the beginning foreword / dedication thing, that really just primes my mind to immediately and constantly compare it to Thing. I can't help but visualize the book using visuals and themes from Thing, rather than whatever the book is trying to describe. It lays bare the connections and similarities, in a way that makes it difficult to get immersed.

What's that? You liked Bioshock? Huh. Okay. Hm. Going underwater, horror motifs, social stratification, sure. And there's your ADAM and plasmids. Everything goes to hell in Art Deco. Look! Splicers! Literal "healing juice"! Super-tough bad guys called "Elites"!

I think what really bothered me is that because I had "video game" as mental background radiation, so "Leon" was damned to become Leon Kennedy, and I don't know for certain where "Aerith" is going, but I assume the next book will involve a Lifestream...

Bought some books at a brick & mortar indie bookstore today. I relished the heft, the texture of the paper, the scent of ink, and the...

Bought some books at a brick & mortar indie bookstore today. I relished the heft, the texture of the paper, the scent of ink, and the physicality of actual paper books.

Then I went home, pirated the books and side-loaded them onto my Kindle.

Content warning:Mildly depressing family thingAn hour into my visit with mom, she asks me if I'm doing a Friendsgiving. I tell her yes,...

Content warning:Mildly depressing family thing

An hour into my visit with mom, she asks me if I'm doing a Friendsgiving. I tell her yes, she asks me what I'm bringing. I say I'm bringing sodas.

I think we both understand that I'm lying out of my ass, but she lets it be.

Content warning:FoodWhat level of bachelor(ette) is " #TacoTuesday with a solo taco station set up in the kitchen and you eat over the...

Content warning:Food

What level of bachelor(ette) is " #TacoTuesday with a solo taco station set up in the kitchen and you eat over the sink"?

🌮 🤔

Content warning:Negativity, internet dramaI wonder how many "friends" on Discord I could remove and they'd never notice. How...

Content warning:Negativity, internet drama

I wonder how many "friends" on Discord I could remove and they'd never notice. How many "tight, close-knit" servers I could leave and not be missed.

Considering even the smallest has like 700 members, probably all of them lol

#WritersCoffeeClub 23: Write under a pseudonym?I have. I do. I will.Aside from the garden-variety internet paranoia from someone my age,...

#WritersCoffeeClub 23: Write under a pseudonym?

I have. I do. I will.

Aside from the garden-variety internet paranoia from someone my age, there's the whole "trans" thing combined with the erotica I've written. Combined with the "works in government" thing, I'm perfectly happy continuing to have my online footprint as Balkanized as possible.

Content warning:Family and coming-out ponderingWondering if I should tell my mom via text before Thanksgiving, since I'm not sure I...

Content warning:Family and coming-out pondering

Wondering if I should tell my mom via text before Thanksgiving, since I'm not sure I wouldn't just blurt it out in person.

Content warning:re: Discussion of transphobia in a fictional sci-fi setting #engenderedwriting 2/2The story itself is a pretty basic...

Content warning:re: Discussion of transphobia in a fictional sci-fi setting #engenderedwriting 2/2

The story itself is a pretty basic "Seven Samurai / Magnificent Seven IN SPACE" thing, and each of the 'samurai' characters have their own backstory and reason for taking on the job. This was just part of her backstory and would be mentioned somewhere along the line, like everyone else's. The story wouldn't be "about" her gender and history in that sense.

I came up with this character years before my egg cracked, after reading Shawl and Ward's "Writing the Other" and realizing my initial cast was very straight, white, cis, and mid-20s to early-30s. Like the other characters I tweaked, I used it as an opportunity to explore and develop the setting rather than to delve into themes that I did not (and in many respects still do not) have authority or experience to get into.

Content warning:Discussion of transphobia in a fictional sci-fi setting #engenderedwriting 1/2#Engenderedwriting #writing 07 and 16 - Have...

Content warning:Discussion of transphobia in a fictional sci-fi setting #engenderedwriting 1/2

#Engenderedwriting #writing 07 and 16 - Have you written/read "outed" stories, Have you written a "gender-bending" role model story?

One of my Eternal WIPs is in a "Wild West" sci-fi setting a la Firefly, Star Wars, Cowboy Bebop. One character is a trans woman who transitioned after serving a term in the military, then worked as a bodyguard going full stealth and wanting to just live her life.

She then foiled an assassination attempt on a popular celebrity. Core World culture was highly steeped in tabloid gossip, crude satire, and parody so it wasn't long before her past was dug up and made into fodder for comedy; shortly after this she left for the "wilder" systems where the story takes place.

Content warning:Childhood trauma (light, mental/emotional)Remembering that time dad made fun of me for crying at a cartoon* and thinking...

Content warning:Childhood trauma (light, mental/emotional)

Remembering that time dad made fun of me for crying at a cartoon* and thinking that may be why I don't let myself get emotionally engaged with media.

*"Lil' Bits" on Nickelodeon, whichever episode where the little girl's parents came back and learning why they abandoned her. Something to do with them being from the outcast "Builderbits" and wanting a better life for her.

Content warning:Pondering family transphobia and shameless opportunism, uspol aftermathAt least I've decided that if/when I come out it...

Content warning:Pondering family transphobia and shameless opportunism, uspol aftermath

At least I've decided that if/when I come out it will be through text message, for space and a buffer from a possible negative gut reaction. Not sure what I would actually say, though.

Content warning:Pondering family transphobia and shameless opportunism, uspol aftermathI really don't know how my mom would react if I...

Content warning:Pondering family transphobia and shameless opportunism, uspol aftermath

I really don't know how my mom would react if I came out to her. I like to think she would take it well, but I don't know what the last ~20 years may have done to her brain.

She has repeatedly offered to give me money to cover debts, which I have refused all but one time. I don't like the idea of feeling indebted to her, or accepting outside help (probably something I should talk to a therapist about).

She probably knows I'm really upset about the election. I almost never reach out to her about anything, and after our brief exchange last week she asked if I wanted to come over for lunch. I said 'maybe next week'.

A part of me wants to play up job stress and ask for more money, so I'm in a better place before coming out. Just in case she doesn't take it well, I can get the money beforehand.

On the other hand, I would feel like a jackass doing that, regardless of her reaction.

Content warning:Vague FFXIV 7.1 MSQ I guessFor the first time since I started playing, I didn't even bother logging in to grind out a...

Content warning:Vague FFXIV 7.1 MSQ I guess

For the first time since I started playing, I didn't even bother logging in to grind out a little MSQ before work on patch day. Then after I got home, I took my time with dinner and a couple of hours of Factorio before grudgingly logging in. I played for like 15 minutes, unlocked the dungeon, and just could not force myself to give a single shit about it. Even the thought of AFK-ing it as DPS with Duty Support was warying. So I logged out and went back to Factorio.

I'm getting spoiled by catching strays on Reddit, and if even half of what I'm seeing is true... Oof. Just oof.

Content warning:re: USPol adjacentThe conversation was brief and neutral, ending shortly after she asked me what "groomers"...

Content warning:re: USPol adjacent

The conversation was brief and neutral, ending shortly after she asked me what "groomers" are.

She was never really into politics or current events, and I knew that she had largely checked out of things after retiring, but... Fucking hell.

Content warning:USPol adjacentGoing to carefully broach the topic of politics with my mom for the first time in... Well, ever. Wish me luck.

Content warning:USPol adjacent

Going to carefully broach the topic of politics with my mom for the first time in... Well, ever. Wish me luck.

Content warning:USPol AftermathI have an Instagram account for lurking, and one of the worst things about their algorithm is that it keeps...

Content warning:USPol Aftermath

I have an Instagram account for lurking, and one of the worst things about their algorithm is that it keeps regurgitating all the "let's go win this" pro-Harris / anti-Trump posts from the last few weeks. Great to keep ripping that fucking wound open again, over and over. Like when Facebook bumps your "I'm getting a divorce" "My dad has cancer" "I just got fired" post from years ago because it got so much engagement!

Coworker helped identify the cause of a bug,* and I once again had to stop myself from replying "POGGERS" in chat.(Or at least the...

Coworker helped identify the cause of a bug,* and I once again had to stop myself from replying "POGGERS" in chat.

(Or at least the unusually specific circumstances necessary for it to happen and thus an easy way to stop it)