conansalaryman - Network
Conan squelched back into the office, his sodden boots leaving a trail even a child could follow. "Which of you dogs tried to flush a...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Conan squelched back into the office, his sodden boots leaving a trail even a child could follow. "Which of you dogs tried to flush a whole roll of toilet paper?" he roared. "The slime-slicked shrine of Dagon was drier than that mens room, and by Crom it was underwater!"
18.3.2025 18:00Conan squelched back into the office, his sodden boots leaving a trail even a child could follow. "Which of you dogs tried to flush a...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
"Tuesday," spat the bronze giant as he leveraged his massive frame into a sitting position. "Better than The Wheel of Pain,...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa..."Tuesday," spat the bronze giant as he leveraged his massive frame into a sitting position. "Better than The Wheel of Pain, but only by the barest of margins."
18.3.2025 11:00"Tuesday," spat the bronze giant as he leveraged his massive frame into a sitting position. "Better than The Wheel of Pain,...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
"Here now," grunted Conan as he stepped through the doorway, "tis a sight more pleasing than all the gold in the suk of...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa..."Here now," grunted Conan as he stepped through the doorway, "tis a sight more pleasing than all the gold in the suk of Khurusan." He tossed his cloak onto the back of his chair. "An office devoid of managers." He settled himself at his desk and prepared for an easy Monday.
17.3.2025 14:00"Here now," grunted Conan as he stepped through the doorway, "tis a sight more pleasing than all the gold in the suk of...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Conan's bellow of barbaric laughter rattled the styrofoam ceiling tiles. "By Crom, tis not enough wine, women, nor gold in the...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Conan's bellow of barbaric laughter rattled the styrofoam ceiling tiles. "By Crom, tis not enough wine, women, nor gold in the world to make me want to work late on Friday!" Still chuckling at his manager's tenacity, he stalked out into the night.
14.3.2025 22:00Conan's bellow of barbaric laughter rattled the styrofoam ceiling tiles. "By Crom, tis not enough wine, women, nor gold in the...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Rolling from his pile of sleeping furs with a flourish that would have put a court tumbler to shame, Conan let out a triumphant roar....
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Rolling from his pile of sleeping furs with a flourish that would have put a court tumbler to shame, Conan let out a triumphant roar. "Friday at last!" he crowed. "Only eleven turns of the glass afore the weekend!" He stalked into the kitchen, a grin upon his broad, bronzed face.
14.3.2025 11:00Rolling from his pile of sleeping furs with a flourish that would have put a court tumbler to shame, Conan let out a triumphant roar....https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Eyes blazing, the giant thrust a spatulate finger towards the battered office clock. "My shift is over, dog!" bellowed Conan....
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Eyes blazing, the giant thrust a spatulate finger towards the battered office clock. "My shift is over, dog!" bellowed Conan. "Ask me to stay later, and by Crom's Bones I'll varnish the floor with your brains!" The manager scuttled away, sheets of paper flying from their arms as they fled.
13.3.2025 22:04Eyes blazing, the giant thrust a spatulate finger towards the battered office clock. "My shift is over, dog!" bellowed Conan....https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
"Gods and Devils! I know why the curs in IT wear spectacles." growled Conan, rubbing his eyes with massive fists. "Any longer...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa..."Gods and Devils! I know why the curs in IT wear spectacles." growled Conan, rubbing his eyes with massive fists. "Any longer staring at this blasted screen, and my eyes are sure to fall from my head." He stomped off the break room.
13.3.2025 18:00"Gods and Devils! I know why the curs in IT wear spectacles." growled Conan, rubbing his eyes with massive fists. "Any longer...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
The portal yawned before him like a toothless maw, a gaping pit descending to the darkest depths of Xandru's Nine Hells. Conan grunted...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...The portal yawned before him like a toothless maw, a gaping pit descending to the darkest depths of Xandru's Nine Hells. Conan grunted sourly, tightened his sword belt, and stepped into the office.
13.3.2025 14:00The portal yawned before him like a toothless maw, a gaping pit descending to the darkest depths of Xandru's Nine Hells. Conan grunted...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
A dagger sprouted suddenly from the face of Conan's foe. "About damned time!" he grumbled, pulling his dagger from the office...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...A dagger sprouted suddenly from the face of Conan's foe. "About damned time!" he grumbled, pulling his dagger from the office clock on his way out.
12.3.2025 22:05A dagger sprouted suddenly from the face of Conan's foe. "About damned time!" he grumbled, pulling his dagger from the office...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
The press of bodies broke on Conan's huge frame like water against a stone. "Are you curs all blind!" he howled, face dark...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...The press of bodies broke on Conan's huge frame like water against a stone. "Are you curs all blind!" he howled, face dark with apoplectic fury. "Tis no more room on the damned train!"
12.3.2025 12:30The press of bodies broke on Conan's huge frame like water against a stone. "Are you curs all blind!" he howled, face dark...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
"The rain has stopped." grunted Conan as he twitched aside the curtain covering the small window set in his bedroom wall....
https://mastodon.social/@conansa..."The rain has stopped." grunted Conan as he twitched aside the curtain covering the small window set in his bedroom wall. "And by Mitra, that is likely the only good thing I can say about Wednesday."
12.3.2025 11:00"The rain has stopped." grunted Conan as he twitched aside the curtain covering the small window set in his bedroom wall....https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
"I find naught funny about the situation," growled Conan, rising awkwardly from the rain-slicked paving stones. He stooped to...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa..."I find naught funny about the situation," growled Conan, rising awkwardly from the rain-slicked paving stones. He stooped to recover his umbrella, the chorus of harsh laughter like knives in his back. "Not all have taloned feet", he continued. The crows perched on the fence continued laughing.
11.3.2025 14:00"I find naught funny about the situation," growled Conan, rising awkwardly from the rain-slicked paving stones. He stooped to...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Conan dragged himself heavily from his pile of sleeping furs. "By the Golden Girdle of the goddess Ishtar, tis only Tuesday," he...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Conan dragged himself heavily from his pile of sleeping furs. "By the Golden Girdle of the goddess Ishtar, tis only Tuesday," he muttered sourly, blinking sleep from his eyes. "Whom must I slay to make this accursed week go faster?"
11.3.2025 11:00Conan dragged himself heavily from his pile of sleeping furs. "By the Golden Girdle of the goddess Ishtar, tis only Tuesday," he...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Snatching up his cloak, Conan dealt his desk a savage kick, toppling the shattered pieces to the carpeted floor. "By the Black Throne...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Snatching up his cloak, Conan dealt his desk a savage kick, toppling the shattered pieces to the carpeted floor. "By the Black Throne of Erlik, I am done with Mondays!" he roared storming out.
10.3.2025 22:00Snatching up his cloak, Conan dealt his desk a savage kick, toppling the shattered pieces to the carpeted floor. "By the Black Throne...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
"Silence, cur!" growled Conan, shaking the plastic shards of his alarm clock from his huge fist. "I wish not to be awake...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa..."Silence, cur!" growled Conan, shaking the plastic shards of his alarm clock from his huge fist. "I wish not to be awake yet." He pulled the sleeping furs over his head and cursed Monday with a zealousness that would have singed the hair of Xandru himself.
10.3.2025 11:00"Silence, cur!" growled Conan, shaking the plastic shards of his alarm clock from his huge fist. "I wish not to be awake...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Dodging the deadly blue bolts of arcane lightning, Conan made a terrific throw. His axe spun in a glittering arc to bury itself in the...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Dodging the deadly blue bolts of arcane lightning, Conan made a terrific throw. His axe spun in a glittering arc to bury itself in the sorcerer's skull, slitting it to the teeth. Blood bubbled from Friday's lips as he toppled to the floor, dead.
7.3.2025 23:00Dodging the deadly blue bolts of arcane lightning, Conan made a terrific throw. His axe spun in a glittering arc to bury itself in the...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Delicate glass implements smashed to the floor as Conan upended the sorcerer's table. Streaking across the room, Friday's arcane...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Delicate glass implements smashed to the floor as Conan upended the sorcerer's table. Streaking across the room, Friday's arcane lightnings smote into the wooden boards, crackling ominously.
7.3.2025 12:00Delicate glass implements smashed to the floor as Conan upended the sorcerer's table. Streaking across the room, Friday's arcane...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Slick, ropey intestines spilled over Conan's sword-calloused hands as he buried his blade in Thursday's belly. "Back to the...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Slick, ropey intestines spilled over Conan's sword-calloused hands as he buried his blade in Thursday's belly. "Back to the Outer Dark, you miserable cur!" he growled, glaring mercilessly up into the beast's death-glazing eyes.
6.3.2025 23:00Slick, ropey intestines spilled over Conan's sword-calloused hands as he buried his blade in Thursday's belly. "Back to the...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
"Come closer so I can kick you free of your illegitimate spine, dog!" roared Conan, tightening his grip on his ancient broadsword....
https://mastodon.social/@conansa..."Come closer so I can kick you free of your illegitimate spine, dog!" roared Conan, tightening his grip on his ancient broadsword. Thursday screeched, its barbed spines quivering, as it circled him warily.
6.3.2025 12:00"Come closer so I can kick you free of your illegitimate spine, dog!" roared Conan, tightening his grip on his ancient broadsword....https://mastodon.social/@conansa...
Conan's fingers closed like an iron vice around the fiend's throat. There was a sharp snap as Wednesday's head fell limply to...
https://mastodon.social/@conansa...Conan's fingers closed like an iron vice around the fiend's throat. There was a sharp snap as Wednesday's head fell limply to the side, forked tongue lolling through shattered teeth.
5.3.2025 23:00Conan's fingers closed like an iron vice around the fiend's throat. There was a sharp snap as Wednesday's head fell limply to...https://mastodon.social/@conansa...