griffingroup - Network

Scientists have discovered that ants don’t get sick...And it’s all thanks to their anty-bodies.#Puns #DadJokes

Scientists have discovered that ants don’t get sick...

And it’s all thanks to their anty-bodies.

#Puns #DadJokes

Just got rejected from NASA...guess they didn't have enough space.#Puns #DadJokes

Just got rejected from NASA...

guess they didn't have enough space.

#Puns #DadJokes

9 out of 10 zoo dentists refuse to treat bears unless it's been given an anaesthetic, proving true the old adage that…There’s safety...

9 out of 10 zoo dentists refuse to treat bears unless it's been given an anaesthetic, proving true the old adage that…

There’s safety in numb-bears.

#Puns #DadJokes

My wife turned to me yesterday and said "have you listened to a single word I've been saying?"And I thought to myself, what a...

My wife turned to me yesterday and said "have you listened to a single word I've been saying?"

And I thought to myself, what a weird way to start a conversation.

#Puns #DadJokes

English is a pretty hard language...You accidentally switch two letters and the whole sentence is urined...#Puns #DadJokes

English is a pretty hard language...

You accidentally switch two letters and the whole sentence is urined...

#Puns #DadJokes

My wife thinks we should allow our pets to share our bed...I finally gave in...After 10 minutes our goldfish finally settled down.#Puns...

My wife thinks we should allow our pets to share our bed...

I finally gave in...

After 10 minutes our goldfish finally settled down.

#Puns #DadJokes

I pulled out a world map, gave a dart to my wife and said: “I’ll take you on a vacation to where the dart lands”...Turns out we’re...

I pulled out a world map, gave a dart to my wife and said: “I’ll take you on a vacation to where the dart lands”...

Turns out we’re going to spend the next three weeks behind the fridge.

#Puns #DadJokes

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens...They're calling it the Apollo G#Puns #DadJokes

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens...

They're calling it the Apollo G

#Puns #DadJokes

Why do chicken coops have two doors?...Because if they had four doors they would be chicken sedans.#Puns #DadJokes

Why do chicken coops have two doors?...

Because if they had four doors they would be chicken sedans.

#Puns #DadJokes

My wife told our son not to play with electricity...Now he’s grounded.#Puns #DadJokes

My wife told our son not to play with electricity...

Now he’s grounded.

#Puns #DadJokes

I knew it was bad news when my friend said ‘’you know our favourite dentist…’’I had to brace myself#Puns #DadJokes

I knew it was bad news when my friend said ‘’you know our favourite dentist…’’

I had to brace myself

#Puns #DadJokes

Science puns make me numb...Math puns make me number.#Puns #DadJokes

Science puns make me numb...

Math puns make me number.

#Puns #DadJokes

I'm going to sell a cologne for men who like dad jokes...I'm going to call it Pungent#Puns #DadJokes

I'm going to sell a cologne for men who like dad jokes...

I'm going to call it Pungent

#Puns #DadJokes

A Roman walks into a bar, raises 2 fingers and says to the bartender..."Five beers, please."#Puns #DadJokes

A Roman walks into a bar, raises 2 fingers and says to the bartender...

"Five beers, please."

#Puns #DadJokes

I have a tremendous sex drive...my girlfriend lives 40 miles away.#Puns #DadJokes

I have a tremendous sex drive...

my girlfriend lives 40 miles away.

#Puns #DadJokes

My dentist pulled out the wrong tooth...He said it was accidental.#Puns #DadJokes

My dentist pulled out the wrong tooth...

He said it was accidental.

#Puns #DadJokes

My wife wouldn’t stop criticising me for having a terrible sense of direction...So, I packed my bags and right.#Puns #DadJokes

My wife wouldn’t stop criticising me for having a terrible sense of direction...

So, I packed my bags and right.

#Puns #DadJokes

Other than humans, what animals are the most talkative?...Yaks.#Puns #DadJokes

Other than humans, what animals are the most talkative?...

Yaks.

#Puns #DadJokes

My Daughter turned 18 this weekend, so I bought her a locket with a picture of herself inside...She's now finally independent.#Puns...

My Daughter turned 18 this weekend, so I bought her a locket with a picture of herself inside...

She's now finally independent.

#Puns #DadJokes

A threesome involves three people, a twosome involves two people...That's why they call me handsome.#Puns #DadJokes

A threesome involves three people, a twosome involves two people...

That's why they call me handsome.

#Puns #DadJokes