zyraph - Network

CW: Work, management, stress, money, rent, tech-related recommendationsFigured out the root cause of my silence, and it has determined so...

CW: Work, management, stress, money, rent, tech-related recommendations

Figured out the root cause of my silence, and it has determined so much of my life. The more involved I get into work, the less energy I have to dedicate to anything else. It creates a void that forces me to try to recover in such a way that I can't even socialize with anyone. Getting promoted was the best thing for my wallet, but the worst thing for my mental wellbeing .

As a result, I'm stepping down from management and going into a very low maintenance position as a grocery picker. This will free my mind to being focused only on what I'm doing at that time and I can mentally clock out when I physically leave work. I'll keep most of my pay, though it's almost $2 an hour less, but I'm still ahead by $3 from this time last year.

I'm planning to break out into being a vtuber, whirh I've wanted to do for a very long time, but just didn't have the time or energy to do it. I want to be able to get donations and such, to help supplement rent, especially since within hours of me starting the process of stepping down, I found out my rent was going up by $300. While I'm trying to move to another apartment with another person that can help with rent (there will be three of us total, all furries, and all very much starting a polycule), I'm still trying to get money saved up to make this transition, which means cutting out a lot of expenses (already cut out YouTube premium, Google One, Lyft/Uber subscriptions, Proton, and a mini server that was about to renew at $25 a year that I didn't really use much).

Having said all of this, I'm trying to minimize every possible tech expenditure possible. All I have left are a shared webhosting account I'm paying $2.06 a month that houses my drag.li links, a VPS that is $15 a month (it is for testing, but I want to convert it to being where I host my V-tuber streams and have it re-stream to Twitch, YouTube, and maybe others), and a campsite.bio subscription for $8 a month that I only pay for because of the custom domain link but I want to eliminate the cost entirely. I also paid for a year of storage for Tuta for emails, but that was to cut the cost of paying Proton for $12 a month, and only paying Tuta for $36 a year. Though I'm using Simple Login for the actual routing of emails, I know I will have to pay for that once the Proton subscription officially ends.

As much as I want to be able to host everything on my own local network, I know I lack the expertise to keep it secure and the free time to actually dedicate to getting the knowledge to make it truly work. What I need help with, is options. I can't afford to keep throwing my money away on subscriptions, and I'm trying to save as much money as I can because I'm so tired of paying so much per month on everything. It's just frustrating to see my money going out the window every month, and I just want to have some fun before I turn 40 and my physical health actually declines. Is there anyone who has ideas to minimize all the cost?

Accidental hiatus, data backup restructuringHaven't used this in awhile. When I wiped my phone to properly set everything up that I...

Accidental hiatus, data backup restructuring

Haven't used this in awhile. When I wiped my phone to properly set everything up that I wanted on it, I kinda forgot to sign into half my stuff because I've just been trying not to lose too much of my mind with work.

Now I just have to focus on eliminating more subscriptions (like Google One) so I can more properly backup my data to my home server. Maxed out my 100GB plan with them, and I should make that data more on-prem anyway.

Need to scale back on everything I'm spending on. Whee...

Wuffi.es Testing and FedilabSo, attempting to test wuffi.es on Fedilab (a Sharkey instance) and I'm noticing it doesn't load much of...

Wuffi.es Testing and Fedilab

So, attempting to test wuffi.es on Fedilab (a Sharkey instance) and I'm noticing it doesn't load much of anything through the app. I'm not sure why, other than something may be incompatible? Like, I can edit my profile pic and banner, and I can write a message, but literally nothing else works, so I'm kinda confused.

@LeoBurr, am I doing something wrong?

CW: Telegram, Switching platformsI need options. I've found out just how bad Telegram has become, and I want to completely distance...

CW: Telegram, Switching platforms

I need options. I've found out just how bad Telegram has become, and I want to completely distance myself from that platform and take as many friends as I can from it. Discord is also not a good platform, and I want to break away from that as well, but that desire isn't as pressing.

What is a platform that can do things similar to Telegram and Discord that also would be easy to get some furry friends to join?

CW: Shitposting, Rackmount Porn, "Power" User, ServersHow I imagine @LeoBurr runs his...

CW: Shitposting, Rackmount Porn, "Power" User, Servers

How I imagine @LeoBurr runs his cluster:

https://youtu.be/-b3t37SIyBs

Shitposting aside, while I've seen what the burr has laid out for hardware, I will say if I could ever get to even a tenth of the hardware in that video (with the home and solar power to match), I would never ask for anything server related for upgrades again X3

CW: AI, Emails, Google, Proton, and the great ad campaignsRemember when Google was the first service to offer 1 GB of email storage? They...

CW: AI, Emails, Google, Proton, and the great ad campaigns

Remember when Google was the first service to offer 1 GB of email storage? They raised the bar for letting everyone be able to just store their emails, never really having to worry about deleting their emails ever again, and to this day that philosophy has stayed true. I only actually delete spam, myself.

Well, as it becomes more and more clear that we are literally just being sold as products, I have taken the nuclear action of downloading all of my emails from various accounts over the years, backing them up to a completely private email service, and deleting them entirely from the previous accounts. Ironically, I had originally decided to put my trust in Protonmail, but I have decided it more prudent to move for two reasons.

1. While Proton does talk about taking privacy very seriously, that privacy comes at a cost. While they may not be selling your data, they will still give it away to any government that simply asks nicely (with a warrant). This toot is not about their failings at actually honoring what they preach, however, so if you're that curious, feel free to just look into it. It's not nearly as private as one would hope.

2. The second cost is in money. Yes, for all the features I really want (connections to 3 domain names, catch-all email addresses for them, and just generally better protection from anyone trying to sell my information), it costs me $12 a month to do. While that doesn't sound like much, I also have other bills I pay for, and I make almost that much in an hour of work, which makes it not as cheap to continue to use. Additionally, I don't really need anything else they offer (I don't need a VPN for myself, I don't want to store data in their drives, I don't need yet another calendar, and I already have my own secure password manager in KeepassXC). Simple Login actually is something I want to keep, but I can just throw $30 at them for a whole year to just keep utilizing the aliases that connect.

All-in-all, I'm not comfortable with spending $144 per year on email services. I need something cheaper, still decently private, not as popular (so it isn't as targeted), and overall just nice enough for just what I need. My threat model isn't really that bad, it's just more keeping my data away from the insane ad industry. Oh, and since they're starting to AI-ify their shit now, I absolutely want to get out of that dumpster fire before it gets permanently stored in the hellscape that is inerasable storage.

I may be too late to completely wipe everything I've ever received and sent in the last...22 years (I feel old now), but I can at least try to minimize the impact from this point forward. I can also permanently wipe emails from specific senders before I import them into the new service. This gives me more control over my data in a way that companies have made everyone forget about.

I'll be taking some time to delete old ones that are irrelevant now (like old Newegg and TigerDirect ads, for example) and keep just the very few emails that I actually have an attachment to. This will also get rid of almost 1 GB of emails (You knew I was coming back to that) so that I don't have to actually care so much about what happens if something happens to them all, since they'll be saved as well!

So, yeah...whee...

CW: Unraid, Fedora Server, Technology, home lab managementSo, I've broken down a little over a week ago and got a free trial for Unraid....

CW: Unraid, Fedora Server, Technology, home lab management

So, I've broken down a little over a week ago and got a free trial for Unraid. I've been using it to create myself a data server, and my plan is to use it for all my data. I've slowly been converting all my storage over to it, and I plan to buy a grandfathered license for their 12 disk plan.

I'll use it specifically for data storage and some very specific docker containers while running Fedora Server on two laptops for critical infrastructure (redundant DHCP, multiple Pi-holes, and probably an IAM once I can figure that out).

I'm finally starting to get a home lab together and it makes me very happy that I can do that ^.=.^

CW: Plural, traumagenic, identityThe sixth one does not have a body, but he is the most dominant aspects we repressed about ourselves. As a...

CW: Plural, traumagenic, identity

The sixth one does not have a body, but he is the most dominant aspects we repressed about ourselves. As a result, his name is Dominic. He runs counter to what the rest of us do, though that is used mostly for a different way to derive pleasure. Think BDSM, but with a giant sadistic streak.

The last one that we know about goes by Core (or Korey). He is our child aspects. He literally just wants friends, and is probably why we believe time doesn't matter when it comes to friendship. He wants everyone to be happy and is the biggest influence to all of us. Also doesn't have a form (yet).

So... That is all of us, for now. We will differentiate posts with a letter or two to make it easier to show which one is speaking. We'll probably put what we all go by as a system on our name on here, which is "Mortiat-Centrina." Basically some remnants from when we sought spirituality.

Codes for who says what:

Raiok Incaris: R
Ashanriu Rivnica: A
Zyraph Chronicros: Z
WI-SP: W
RidgeRain: RR
Dominic: D
Core (Korey): C

If there are no letters, it comes from what we call "Cohesion" which is also known as co-fronting. We like our word better ^.=.~

Anyway, thread over (finally). For anyone who has looked though all of this, thank you so truly much for indulging our level of literal insanity. It actually means a huge deal to us! <3

Like, seriously. Just showing support really, really, REALLY helps right now, because we're very nervous. ^.=.^;;

CW: Plural, traumagenic, identityNow, onto the more exciting part of it. Some pieces form from other ideals of people, others form as a way...

CW: Plural, traumagenic, identity

Now, onto the more exciting part of it. Some pieces form from other ideals of people, others form as a way to prevent issues from happening again. We have a combination of those, and of course there's other ways they can form as well. Some take on different people, different genders, species, etc.

So, for us, we are all various dragons. Maybe we just had THAT much creative influence from the furry fandom, or maybe we just decided that being Otherkin should extend to every piece. It's quite hard to say for sure where this all stemmed from, but the end result is we don't feel human. At all.

So, we're going to list each piece and what they basically do. Each one can talk to the others, so nothing is hidden. As one discovers something, we all do. There are some that can't or won't do this, to protect the other pieces, but ours all believe in complete cooperation. So, onto listing them.

The first piece would be Raiok Incaris. This was actually our first fursona, so when he emerged, he literally took it over and became the embodiment of our spiritual journey. He's also a bit more calm, and loves philosophy. Most older friends know this one, but not so many know about our split.

The second piece would be the default one that talks to everyone. Ashanriu Rivnica is a creative writer, diplomat, and extremely friendly with everyone. Basically the "face" most people interact with, including at work. He is the filter, and tries to keep everything cohesive. *waves*

The third is the image of what a lot are familiar with. Zyraph Chronicros is actually the protective one, and he directs that protection towards others. He believes in helping others to succeed and will defend friends if they are emotionally hurt. He also wants to physically become stronger!

The fourth is a lot, more recent, within the last, couple of years. WI-SP (pronounced Wisp) is our logic. Pronouns are it/its. It takes over in life-threatening circumstances and automatically does loss mitigation. It constantly calculates everything it can. Simulates emotion.

The fifth is even more recent, and he goes by RidgeRain. He actively looks for our best interest, even if that means being a bit selfish. He protects us from anything that affects us internally, and keeps us (mostly) from causing any physical issues. He doesn't talk much to others.

CW: Plural, traumagenic, identitySo, a decision has been made. Going to start saying "we" and "us" when referring to...

CW: Plural, traumagenic, identity

So, a decision has been made. Going to start saying "we" and "us" when referring to myself. Been plural for over a decade, but only now comfortable with showing that through social media. To those not aware, we are a traumagenic system through Dissociative Identity Disorder.

There are currently 7 voices in our head, and it is possible that could grow, but that is the information we have gathered currently. To those not familiar, basically each "voice" is in charge of some perspectives about different subjects but are best within their own specialty.

We'll be making this thread to differentiate and use as a reference for anyone curious about this condition or what things are like for us. Please note that we are not experts on DID or systems in general, nor do we pretend to be. We can only speak from our experiences, not "generally."

The first thing to do would be to show what we are generally, and a little history on how this all happened to us. The short answer is "trauma." However, it's much more complicated. Basically, outside of a few major issues we have had, it was mainly a lot of little traumas that broke us apart.

See, when someone gets stressed out so severely due to a lot of different changes and external factors, one can internalize that and eventually attempt to ignore all that pain by pretending it's someone else that is instead dealing with it. That's kinda how that happened to us.

We literally just started trying to ignore our own pain and focus on others, to the extent that our own pain just didn't matter. That is, until it did matter. And oh boy did it matter alot! It got so bad that literally the slightest thing turned us extremely emotional and our responses just stopped.

When that happened, we started shutting out a lot, of external things, stopped going to college classes, and eventually... We shattered. Of course, we weren't 7 starting out. At first, it was two pieces, at least that we know of. As time went on, eventually more were discovered.

This condition can improve or worsen, depending on external as well as internal factors. It's a very, very complicated topic, and we won't pretend this is how it happens to everyone. This is simply our experience.

There are much better experts that know a lot more about this. Research is key!

CW: Relationship, Happy Feels, Difference of RomanceIt has become so apparent that we were simply made for each other. We connect in so many...

CW: Relationship, Happy Feels, Difference of Romance

It has become so apparent that we were simply made for each other. We connect in so many different ways that we may as well have been given the same mind at birth and just let the environment alter us in that way. We both, feel perfect for each other. Ever, since that, perfect day trip with my family, it's only gotten more perfect each day. I don't know if it truly is just luck, or divine intervention, or what... But... We are absolutely crazy about each other! And this doesn't seem like it's going to end... Because, we want the other to know they are loved, and worth everything to the other. We are of one mind.

Some people say opposites attract, and there are some differences. He's definitely taller, and he seems to be a little more quiet. However... The similarities are far more important, at, least to us. And there's alot more that is similar than different. I even helped him figure out his fursona, because he didn't really know what he wanted. I used a more spiritual approach to finding it for him. Definitely found a dragon :3

It's... So crazy, so cool, and wonderful, just to find a mirror. He's basically a mirror of myself, and I want to protect that mirror with my life. And that is why I'll never let him go... And why he won't let me go either.

December 15th can't come soon enough <3

CW: Relationship, Happy Feels, Difference of RomanceI've not been very active on here, aside from being on a sky-oriented site. However,...

CW: Relationship, Happy Feels, Difference of Romance

I've not been very active on here, aside from being on a sky-oriented site. However, there's another reason. November 1st, I went down to Nashville, IN with my immediate family, and had the perfect little day vacation there. Got to go to a few little shops and just have fun.

However, on the way back, someone reached out to me from a couple of years ago, and we started talking again. This person was someone I had feelings for at the time, but couldn't actually pursue anything, because I was committed to my spouse. However, when we started talking again, I realized... There were no longer any strings attached. I could actually pursue this person.

So, we discussed feelings. He felt the same way, as he also had been out of his previous relationship since then (that's actually why we had lost contact, because he had to move back to New Jersey). We talked about everything, and decided to start pursuing a relationship together.

Not even two days after that, I got into a call with him while at work... He just wanted to hear my voice throughout the day while I was working. I just threw the caveat that I may not be able to talk much to him because I would be busy. It was no problem to him. So, I did it. And we grew closer. I never hung up the call. We stayed in the call, just talking about random things, and just really connecting more.

We found a lot of things in common. Usually I run out of things like that within two conversations. We, to this day, are still finding things in common with each other. It slowly grew from "I want to be in a relationship" to "I want to spend more time with you."

He said he could visit with his brother next month. We started planning on how to spend the time. A few days later, it dawned on me. I'm getting an apartment for myself, to sort out what and who I want to be. Literally next month, before his visit, I'll have this place. Why not... Let him move in?

We talked about it. He wanted it too. He told his family about it. They absolutely agreed without any convincing. His visit is now a move. We feel closer together.

We talked about past relationships. We both never felt like the ones we were in at the time were good ones. This one feels different. We actually feel a lot, more than just compatibility. We feel like a reflection of each other. It's grown in so much intensity that we want to spend the rest of our lives together. Growing old together. Taking care of each other.

Born to rawrForced to ask customers if they're finding everything OK.

Born to rawr
Forced to ask customers if they're finding everything OK.

CW: RL, eye contactFelt cute, might get more self-confidence later ^.=.~

CW: RL, eye contact

Felt cute, might get more self-confidence later ^.=.~

So, compared to a a different sky-like site that I've been frequenting... The Halloween dwaggies have been boosted and favorited a lot...

So, compared to a a different sky-like site that I've been frequenting... The Halloween dwaggies have been boosted and favorited a lot more over here... Like, it's no contest o.=.o;;

To those that have done so, thank you so very much for favoriting and boosting it! That's the most popular post I've made on here by far, and it means a lot to me that you all like it so much <3

Choose your Halloween dragon! A secret fifth one will be revealed soon! ^.=.~Thanks to @DoomWeaselArt for their wonderful skill in bringing...

Choose your Halloween dragon! A secret fifth one will be revealed soon! ^.=.~

Thanks to @DoomWeaselArt for their wonderful skill in bringing each of these friends of mine to life! I can't say enough how much I love these! They are taking commissions in this style for $15 each, or get a full-body one for $30! They work quickly!

Someone is impersonating multiple profiles under the guise of "It's crossposting from Twitter" without the account owner's...

Someone is impersonating multiple profiles under the guise of "It's crossposting from Twitter" without the account owner's consent or knowledge. I highly recommend everyone make sure their own content is not on their site, and instance admins may want to actually defederate because they're legit stealing content. The site maker seems to be very connected to AI art and whatnot, so I wouldn't be surprised if they were stealing art to generate their own crap work.

The fake profile is @zyrchron@bird.makeup

Please report that profile. It is marked as a bot and they are using my likeness without my consent.

Admittedly I've been on a different site a lot, more than this one. I'm not quite sure why, I think it's probably just because...

Admittedly I've been on a different site a lot, more than this one. I'm not quite sure why, I think it's probably just because of more interactions. I do hope there will be a way to cross-post between here and there o.=.o

CW: My past experiences and traumaI just posted a journal to multiple places that I haven't been to in years. My aim is to provide...

CW: My past experiences and trauma

I just posted a journal to multiple places that I haven't been to in years. My aim is to provide closure, both to myself, as well as others who may want to reach out again. I have a feeling I'm probably completely forgotten, but maybe someone will reach out. All I know is I need to find a way to heal, and if anything can help me truly go through that process, it would be hearing from anyone from my past, and possibly reconnect with them after so long.

If anyone is curious, the old profiles in question are in my social links, located at https://zyraph.drag.li under Deprecated. I want to rebuild bridges, even if I'm not good at keeping contact with others, I want to reconnect with anyone who is willing to have me back in their life. I was really not the best, back then, and I can only hope that my cringe can be outweighed by my sincerity.

CW: Trauma, emotionsI have had a lot of things pop up in the last month. I've been trying to get through it, but it's not been easy...

CW: Trauma, emotions

I have had a lot of things pop up in the last month. I've been trying to get through it, but it's not been easy to cope. I have not had the ability to process much, and it has settled into a kind of trauma. It's not been easy, and as much as I've been trying to cope with it, I have not had a chance to go through actual therapy for it all.

I need to properly deal with the issues I'm having, and I don't know if there's anything that can help other than literal years of therapy. I'm not sure what else to do, and I need to figure out where my insurance can cover it. It's hard to even get these words out right now.

Before anyone worries, I'm not doing anything rash, I'm just having issues coping.